News An Open Letter To @mubasherlucman - Stop Talking To Chair

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Sep 28, 2012
An Open Letter to @MubasherLucman - Stop Talking to Chair

Why does Mubasher Lucman even bother to invite guests on his show? It is not like he will be courteous enough to talk to them or listen to their views, considering they took out time for him. He might as well get mannequins to sit in as guests, who will not speak even when asked a direct question; perfect for a Mubasher Lucman show. To top that, Lucman spends a large part of his show talking to an empty chair and the rest of the time talking to himself – this man needs help and fast.

Nonetheless, there were four guests on Khara Saach on December 17, 2013 - Pakistani film director Syed Noor and three other unknown or little known people. But even if Lucman had invited four aliens it wouldn’t really have matter because the narcissist doesn’t want any comments unless they are praising him and then he only wants to hear his own voice.

The episode began with Lucman as usual telling us that he had a scoop he would reveal later (we all know he doesn’t have anything really. We suggest he find a new gimmick as this is getting old).

Apparently, Mubasher Lucman is tries to add masala to his show but it doesn’t work. This is a poorly scripted show more of a pain for the serious viewer. What is even more irritating is that Mubasher Lucman leaves unfinished sentences and unfinished topics – making it extremely confusing – and jumps from one subject to another interjected with the words Jang and Geo.

By the first five minutes of the show, a large number of viewers switch channels to watch good masala and nice looking faces on Bigg Boss 7 – not on ARY but on the Indian channel.

Meanwhile, coming back to the December 17 episode of KS, Pakistan’s renowned director Syed Noor was trying to highlight the issue he and the other guests had come to discuss – a MOU in which cinema owners and film producers and directors had united for the first time to work for the betterment of the dead Pakistan industry. Syed Noor had hardly managed to speak, when Lucman butted in and began his monologue. Poor Noor probably didn’t even get to speak a dozen lines in the whole episode and that too if Mubasher Lucman permitted.

The rest of the guests had no idea what was going on, one of them was sleeping – can’t blame the poor guy, it must be hard to keep conscious in such boring circumstances. When Mubasher Lucman deemed it his pleasure to ask this gentleman something, all he got was incoherent muttering before he dozed off again. Mubasher Lucman didn’t care as he was too busy talking to the empty chair and cracking some lame jokes that only he understood.

As usual the episode didn’t focus on anything important, at least as far as the general public goes. Mubasher did his ritual of talking about the former CJP, Mir Shakeel and Arsalan Iftikhar and the usual dialogues he often repeats on his shows.

Then there was mumbling from the guests – one Jahangir Beg who was praising Mubasher Lucman for his ‘services’ to the Pakistani film industry. Syed Noor also tried to applaud Mubasher Lucman’s efforts but lacked conviction doing a bad job than his heroes; while the journalist from ARY’s Lahore Bureau said things that really didn’t make sense. He said that some people held a covert meeting in which he was invited, adding they were probably hiding from him. Do we detect a hint of paranoia? Can there be another budding Mubasher Lucman from the loins of ARY – perish the thought.

Suddenly Mubasher thought his guests had spoken more than they were due and he couldn’t take the small talk on the revival of Pakistani film industry, he promptly took command of the conversation and came back to his “scoop”.

The so-called scoop involved the trademark of the new pet of Lucman, Bol. Apparently, Lucman got hold of some papers through which he tried to convince the viewer that Mir Shakeel had tried to get hold of the Bol trademark through backdated documents. Lucman that Mir Shakeel allegedly said that Bol was already part of the Jang team. Lucman ‘explained’ that in fact the backdate documents were of when Geo applied for Pakistan Idol’s trademark in 2007 and the name was changed from Pakistan Idol to Bol, and presented.

But isn’t Idol an international brand and already registered – and if Mir Shakeel got the franchise would he really have to register this trademark in Pakistan. And Geo has permission from the international company that owns Idol Freemantle and 19 Entertainment to use this trademark.

In a very filmy way, Lucman said that Mir Shakeel allegedly got the papers switched and used the backdated papers from 2007 showing that he had already applied for Bol in the past. And then, in a sad dramatic way he added that now the file was missing...

We suggest Lucman stop reading cheap detective stories and come up with a modern technological twist to his stories to make them more interesting to the listener.

Lucman also said that Mir Shakeel went to court to say that he didn’t know that a channel called Bol was being launched, adding that earlier Mir Shakeel had said that he already applied and got the trademark Geo Bol. And that the Jang group had been aware of this but had refused knowledge of the same in November.

Based on Mubasher Lucman’s whole ‘theory’, why would someone who already has several successful channels on air and nine applications requesting new ones go to all the trouble to swipe the trademark Bol, when it doesn’t even go with the rest of the series of channels that the company owns? Let’s say that Jang does take away the name Bol, does that mean that the company can’t be launched?

Even if what Lucman was taken seriously, how does it affect the people of this country? The matters that he tries to portray as detrimental to national security are nothing but a lot of noise. He may be getting a lump of money to protect his new master’s interests and he is spending a good time on that, but he should first get off ARY, be loyal to one group. A word of advice to the new channel, you would have more credibility if you had hired someone with integrity and honour, as well as a sense of loyalty – but you chose Mubasher Lucman, your decision.

And Mubasher Lucman stop talking to an empty chair, it is embarrassing for you.